Day 9 - So Slow

I look back on the last few years and see how fast it has flown by. Days blur into weeks and weeks into months and so on. But I've noticed this past week that life seems to be going a bit slower. I'm not sure if it's because I'm feeling tortured by eating less or if it's that I am embracing each day by recording the day and giving it purpose. I hope it's the latter. That makes me look more mature and spiritual.

Jack, our student ministry pastor said something Sunday night at Crosswalk that I've been meditating on. He was talking about how we will all suffer as Christians but we should also be suffering for Christ. They are two different things. He made such a great point. In Egypt, there are Christians persecuted every day. But he asked if all people in Egypt, not necessarily Christians, go through heartache in their lives. Cancer? Loss of a child? Fires? Financial hardship? Yes, everyone does. Well then why do we as Christians call that "suffering for Christ"? It was such a great reminder. We can suffer well with something God has brought our way but circumstances like that are brought on by sin - as a whole - in this world, not from serving Christ!

I am a middle-class American. I am a white woman. I have a four bedroom house with two and a half baths. I live in a neighborhood with sidewalks. I park my newer car in a warm garage. I work at a Christian organization. I have a great office with two (yes two) huge computer monitors. I have a great chair with great ergonomic support. I am 20 feet from a bathroom. I have a church that will support me if anything ever goes wrong in my life. I have a family that would give everything for me. I have a husband who works hard to provide for me and loves me.

I say all of that because I DON'T KNOW SUFFERING FOR CHRIST. I have a hard time wrapping my head around why I live the way I do and if I should be living differently. But this I know: right now, this minute, I am following the will of God. I am reading His Word, praying to Him, seeking Him for idols in my heart, being sensitive to the Holy Spirit, trying to confess when I see sin in my life. Because I don't know what my future holds. I don't know where I will be in ten years. I don't know what God's preparing me for but I know He knows and that's all I really care about today.

Thanks Aaron and Sonya for posting the persecution blog. Great reminder and also a great confirmation to the chewing I've been doing these last couple of days.

On a lighter, non-spiritual note: The first episode of the last season of LOST is coming on tonight and I'm excited to head over to Justin and Beccah's to watch it with some people.